kind of just wishing for death right now. feels like i cannot get anything right. and it seems that mistakes are not allowed for me.
any time that i do anything vaguely wrong, i get hated for it. i am only human, but he seems to believe that i don't get any mistakes. though i always forgive him for any slip up.
i don't cheat. i don't intentionally hurt or harm. but i get hated anyway.
too much shit right now. too much failure. too many hopes smashed into nothing.
going on 30 but i have nothing to show for it.
half the people or more that i grew up with are getting married and/or having babies this year. the rest already have. but here i sit. probably alone because i cannot be perfect.
too many things that i cannot go back and change. too many years wasted. too much done that cannot be undone. stuck so deep that i cannot get out.
just want to go to sleep and never wake up.
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