...progression...on a roll...

1. Ever kissed a brown eyed and brown haired person?
yes. more than one...

2. Can you see a phone right now?
my amazing cellphone. guaranteed to be more unique and definitely cooler than yours.

3. What are you listening to?
the 10+ people in my living room speaking mostly hangzhouhua and watching some american movie.
i wasn't even told that this many people were coming over...
and i know most of them...
but i wasn't told...much less invited...

4. Where is it coming from?
my living room...which is right outside the open door to my bedroom where i sit...alone...on my bed...filling out this survey thing...knowing that it is past 11pm, and i know that my roommate knows that i work early.

this is so extremely fucked up.

5. Last thing you ate?
the chicken and broccoli and green bean and snow pea garlicky stuff that i made for my dinner...and lunch and dinner tomorrow.

6. What was the last thing you saw on TV?
some weird game show kind of program that i couldn't understand much of.

7. Who was the last person other than family you saw?
neo when he came to ask me for scissors to chop up some pot to probably be put in the little pipe i lent my roommate...and i haven't even been offered a puff.

8. Are labels/stereotypes good?
they could be the root of much evil

9. What is your least favorite bill to pay?
all of them...this month it would be the insanely high electric bill. and i don't even have heat in my room.

10. Song stuck in your head?
there have been about 12 different ones today. currently there isn't one.

11. Acoustic or Electric guitars?
eenie, meenie, minei, moe...

12. Do you dance while getting ready for whatever?
i am constantly dancing. so, that would be a yes.

13. What are you wearing right now?
hang on, i have to look...

my beloved cahoots hoodie, a grey, lightly ribbed, longsleeved shirt, my maserati (the band, not the car) t-shirt, white long johns, underwear that is too much to explain, grey ribbed leg warmers, one black and grey sock with a newly broken hole on the ball of it, one light and dark grey sock, one too-big pinkish purple hand warmer that i knitted last month, one tight, pink, almost perfect handwarmer that i also knitted last month, the amazing stone necklace that demi gave me, my jie half of the heart i bought to give the other half to demi, and 3 small hair clips.

14. What is the greatest number of people you've been in front of?
thousands. my friend anson made me go on stage with him and the other 13 members of his random rock band for his university's 75th birthday celebration.
i live in china. there were at LEAST several thousand in the audience.

15. Have you ever taken a shower while crying?
oooooooohhhhhhhh yeah.

i do a lot in the shower...

16. Do you like Techno?
good techno.

17. Have you ever made out on a plane?
...i don't THINK so...

18. Do you have leadership skills?
yeah, but i am a total schizo, so while i have leadership skills, i make a terrible leader.

19. Can you play an instrument?
i have been known to go through periods of attempting to play things sometimes. maybe when i retire (hahahahaHA) i will finally REALLY take up the cello.

20. Have you ever sat on a roof and looked at stars?
oh wow, yes. several roofs have been committed to memory.

21. Ever done that while talking on the phone to a boyfriend or girlfriend?
most likely. or if not a boyfriend or girlfriend, then at least while talking to a lover on the phone.

22. Have you recently gotten someone pregnant?
not unless i am a hermaphrodite with a dual personality...and somehow manage to mentally hide the erroneous sex organ from the other half...hmmmmmmmmm

23. Are there any animals around you at the moment?
there is a very large plush pig in traditional mandarin chinese dress inn the little room that has my package taped-together desk and my drying laundry, a white stuffed toy dog from the world carnival hangzhou (which is actually in xiaoshan) that i found in my last apartment and for some weird reason kept, there is a squirrel from u of l wearing the u's shirt, and i think that i hung onto my two wooden kissing pigs (they have a string in between them that holds them together and brings them back when you pull them apart), so they must be around here somewhere...and as always, the insane xiao maomen are lurking around somewhere in the apartment.

24. Ever thought you were going to get married?
yup. and i did. and that was a really bad thing to do with that person, as it turned out. so i put a stop to it.
now i haven't a clue if it will ever happen again...
...and i am actually quite okay with that.

25. Last person who told you they loved you besides family?
a max

26. Favorite time of day?
the good times. how can i possibly have a favorite time of day? all of my days are so very different, and when they are not, they are exactly the same...

27. Favorite food?
ANYTHING FROM THE MENU AT ZEN GARDEN...damn, jeneane----shit, i so cannot spell your name----i had forgotten how amazing the food there is...

lately, i think that ma la tang and hot pot effing rule!

28. Cat person or dog person?
it depends entirely on the individual animal. right now my daily life is living proof of that.

29. Got a job?
good lord, yeah, i do.


30. Biggest regret?
you just really cannot go back and change a thing in the past. so i am learning as partially conditioning myself to let go of any vague regrets.

31. What do you want the most?
to be able to speak and understand mandarin chinese and hangzhouhua.

32. Do you want children?
if it is the right circumstance and situation...i would like maybe one. i refuse to go through a pregnancy alone, but if i really want one alone, i will have one. obviously the circumstances etc. are not in alignment presently.

33. Are you a lover or a fighter?
very much both.

34. Last time you had butterflies?
been having a panic attack off and on for the past 2 hours...i think maybe butterflies are like little panic attacks...

35. How is your mood today?
it has been maybe more all over the place than any other recent time...

36. What do you do all the time in a car?
lately, sleep and knit. the 'car' in am in on a regular basis (i ' ' car because the actual vehicle changes constantly...just when i think i know all of the cars these people have...another one appears)

37. Do you like anyone?
i like a lot of people...but right now i am not feeling very liked at all. i am quite hurt...

38. Have you ever changed your clothes while in a vehicle?
many times. i change my clothes a lot...though there are people that change more. i have also changed my clothes sitting in a booth at a club. layers effing rawk! so many possible combinations and arrangements...

39. Who was the last person to make you cry?
right now, my roommate and my acquaintances in my living room are making me want to cry.

40. When was the last time you cried?
probably going to happen at some point tonight.

41. What is one thing you miss about your past?
being able to drink water straight out of the tap.

42. What is one thing you've learned about life?
STILL LEARNING...yup...every day...so many things, so many different kinds of things.

43. Is anyone jealous of you?
don't know why anyone would be at this moment.

44. Has a friend ever used you?
more than one friend, more than once.

45. Has anyone recently told you that they like you more than as a friend?
yes.

46. Who was the last person you drove with?
xiaozhou, "amy", and "tracy" home from work today. but i haven't driven a car since the first week of december.

47. Why are you filling out this survey?
because i have nothing else to occupy me at the moment.

48. What was the last movie you watched?
nana. and it was fucking awesome.

49. What is something that you want to do within the next week?
drink margaritas tomorrow night and get fucked up and listen to fun music.

50. Who last messaged you?
ding ding sent me a picture of a chipmunk. completely out of the blue. it was awesome.

51. Is there anyone you are excited to see soon?
yup. get to see my friend young and my mei mei demi tomorrow night. at leats that is the plan...and you know what they say about plans...

52. Do you use post-its?
i like to, but there never seems to be any around.

53. Do you like gum?
i like this one kind of wrigly's they have here. it is yummy.

54. Do you have more friends that are girls or boys?
boys. for sure. has been that way since about 6th grade.

55. Has anyone ever talked about you behind your back?
in the days of twice told, my name was put in various writing on the walls of the "girl's" bathroom stalls more than anyone else's.

here, at times i am talked about behind my back in front of my face. i stand out like a very sore thumb and cannot understand much of what is being said, and it is obvious that there is a good chance that i cannot.

56. Favorite boy name?
i have a lot...i have liked the name logan and the name luke for a long time...but i know that there are many others.

57. Favorite girls name?
annika elizabeth mackenzie.

58. What's your biggest fear?
honestly...i am not quite sure about what i fear...nothing truly ever comes to mind when faced with this question.

59. Have you ever cried yourself to sleep?
AGAIN, I AM FEMALE!...hear us roar!

60. Have you ever not been able to get someone out of your head?
yup.

61. Are you a player?
i have my moments. sometimes there is a game to be played...if you play it well...and the other player is good...there can be momentary rewards.

62. Have you ever dated/fooled around with a co-worker?
yup. it is rarely a good thing afterwards...

63. Asked someone out in the past few months?
in a sense.

64. Name 5 of your favorites:
1. my amazing blue fluffly bathrobe
2. getting lovely high and dancing in a good shower
3. making stuff
4. cannot ever live without music. had i not heard any within 24 hours of being born, i would have shriveled up and died. thanks to my saundra taking me to concerts in the womb and surrounding me with beautiful things and my mama and papa being amazing and feeding me music.
5. deep connections...that are mutually sustained

65. Is something bothering you right now?
not any more...conversation with the one that really matters to me was had. there are people that maybe i should explain my extreme shyness to...and i need to get further over it. so i am now a bit bothered by myself...but i will work on that, too.

66. What is it?
that i need to work on reinforcing the outer walls of my insecurities so that they might diminish somewhat...and it is hard...

i need some more people that i can talk to.
or maybe i just need to try to talk more to people?

67. Is there something else you should be doing at the moment?
maybe sleeping...if i was THAT type of person. but i am virtually the only one at work tomorrow. so as long as i get there...it really doesn't matter if i am hungover or exhausted or anything.

68. If you could have one wish, what would it be?
to have my own bar/laundromat/cafe/art venue...
i guess, basically have a venue and be able to sustain myself on the proceeds...and do it in hangzhou.

that, and to wake up in the morning and find that i can magically speak and understand pu tong hua and hang zhou hua.

69. How is your hair right now?
idiotic, rebellious in all the wrong ways...too thin...in a word...just wrong.